Allow me to reintroduce myself!!!!

Hello everyone! My name is Kristen, but most people know me as Nikki. I wanted to introduce myself briefly so you know who exactly is behind these blog posts. God is my everything and I have decided to enlighten people on situations that I may have gone through or situations that happen daily and blog about it. I know there is someone out there that can relate to various things I may posts. You won't find a the same things being said on here all of the time so you won't ever get bored. Thank you for reading (if you are) and I appreciate the love and support. I hope this blog changes your view of life one post at a time. God bless and one love. 

Trusting the Enemy

I was watching an interview and the person being interviewed proceeded to talk about how we tend to trust our enemies more than trusting what should be right. The discussion started to make me think about how true that statement was. 

Why we are quick to trust what is going against us first before we trust what is for us? 

Definition Enemy:

• The definition of enemy means a person who is actively opposed or hostile to someone or something.

• A hostile nation or its armed forces or citizens,especially in time of war.

• A thing that harms or weakens something else.

It is within our human nature to despise the enemy, but also trust them at the same time. Enemies can be within your family, friends, church and maybe sometimes the person who you may be in a relationship with. There is always a deceiver when it comes to recognizing the enemy because our society glorifies the enemy and makes it look like he, she, or it is the right way to choose.

In my life there has been decisions I made in which I thought was the easiest decision for me at the time, but then turned out to have many consequences that came after the fact. There are many times that I have had enemies in the form of everything that you can think of, but I put my trust into them and didn’t realize how it was going to strip me of my character and sanity.

Definition of Trust

• Firm belief in the reliability, truth, ability, or strength of someone or something. “relations have to be built on trust”

• Confidence placed in a person by making that person the nominal owner of property to be held or used for the benefit of one or more others. 

You see how it says in the first part of the definition that “relations have to be built on trust”? Why would we want to build a relationship of trust with an enemy? It’s almost like us giving our money to a person who robs banks and trusting them to give us all the money back. 

When you put your trust into the enemy and start to model your life off of the choices regarding so, it will feel good at first. All of the sudden one day you don’t feel like yourself and start to feel ill. Slowly you’re emotional, mental, and physical state will start to break down and lead you to feel as if you are nothing.

When we eat organic food such as fruits and vegetables our bodies reacts in a positive manner because the food is not working against our body, but for our body. When we partake in eating processed foods our bodies do not react as well because those types of foods are working against our bodies. Our body is aware that we are not supposed to be eating such things, but once we continue our body becomes immune to it, while slowly breaking down at the same time. The same scenario goes for exercise because we know our body needs it, but we would rather watch TV on the couch and drain our brain with toxic television shows because it’s easier. 

“The thief does not come to except to steal, and to kill, and to destroy. I have come that they may have life, and that they may have it more abundantly.” John 10:10 

The enemy does not always make himself/herself known, and it most certainly does not make what consequences you are bringing to yourself be known. The enemy can sometimes be right inside of you without you recognizing the damage being done. It is a choice to make on whether you will start to pay attention to who you are trusting and who you should not. Stop trusting the enemy and start fighting the enemy away from your heart, mind, and body.

Reservations

Why do I not make reservations for things in my life that are good for me, when I shouldn't be having reservations about things that could be detrimental to my future? Hi! My name is Kristen and you may also know me by Nikki. I tend to have reservations for a lot of things that can be a benefit to my future, but I really don't mean to! No really, I don't even notice that I am doing this half of the time.

Have you ever asked yourself why you may be cautious about different things when God has spoken loud and clear to you already. He has told you that there is something he wants you to do, but you ignore every sign and confirmation that he sends your way! Yet when something isn't maybe the best decision you tend to dive into those situations faster. Yes this is me alllllll the time.

Picture this scenario......you called and made reservations for a restaurant for you and a date. You show up before your date gets there so you can get the table on time. You get to the table and you start patiently waiting for him/her to arrive. You start to realize time has gone by and there is no site of your date. Finally you see your date walking into the restaurant, but they decide to go to the bathroom first before they come to the table. Then you see them come out of the bathroom and go to talk to someone else and your waiving trying to get their attention, but they're not seeing you. So you wait as long as you possibly can while your getting annoyed at the same time. Wouldn't it be an awful feeling if your date doesn't even realize you are there, but you've taken the time to make reservations and took time out to sit and wait for them!

Imagine God feeling that way about us? 
He's sitting waiting for us to come to the table and he's trying to get our attention, but we ignore him because we want to make pit stops and everything else before get to him. If I'm sitting and waiting for someone for a long time eventually I would leave and never want to speak to that person again. The good part about this is that God is going to continue to wait for us to recognize that he's there.

 He's going to constantly send signs and wonders our way until he gets our attention, but hopefully it's not too late. God is waiting for you to sit at the table with him so he can go over  his blueprint he has for your life, but he's only going to sit there as long as you want him to.  Sometimes we are waiting for the wrong situations to change when we are missing out on what God is really trying to tell us. Don't lose time making reservations for the wrong things and not making reservations for the right things in your life. Once the right reservations are made everything will come on time and will meet you right where you are at.

Do we have the power to fight anymore?

The song Fight the Power by Public Enemy came out in the year 1989 (The year I was born) where the culture of Hip Hop was so rich and and vibrant. Our culture was not taking no crap from anyone as they say it and we were willing to stand for what we believe in and who we are. This has me thinking, where did all of that stamina go within my people and why have "we" as in black people have settled to be the laughing stock of the country? Let me start by saying that I am not, by no means trying to down any culture or race, but I only speak from the only view I know and that is of being a black woman. I was taught growing up that I will always have people not like me and sometimes they will not like me simply because of my color. As I've grown older I am starting to understand that concept more than ever. The same social frustrations that were happening back in 1989 is happening today at this very moment. There are politicians that are in the race to be the presidential candidate giving false hope and dreams to our community. As Dick Gregory stated "Political promises are much like marriage vows. They are made at the beginning of the relationship between candidate and voter, but are quickly forgotten." We tend to get even more frustrated as the race starts to look like a circus with much confusion, but these candidates are still wanting our vote whether they do anything for our community or not.
Being a black woman in America is very tough these days. We seem to be fighting a reputation that has been based off of opinions, lies, and a handful that has been able to make it to a national platform that isn't always the best. Don't get me wrong there are A LOT of black women who are great role models and doing things for their communities. It does not mean that I can fall back and say to myself that they can make an imprint for me. I choose to also make an imprint on this earth as well no matter how many good role models their are for black women. I still do not believe that the age group that I'm within or any age in general gets enough credit for what we bring to America. We have style that is taken from others, grace that is tested on a daily basis, and an aura that cannot be replaced by anyone else. We are cut from a strong clothe that is priceless. Now some people have an issue with me saying that some of the people that represent my culture and heritage on television are not as good and they pretty much suck! I only say this because I care about how my people are represented EVERYWHERE!
Our people should get back to business and find that fire to light within themselves to get to work! There is no excitement anymore because life seems to get in the way and once you watch the news you pretty much become depressed. There is so much work to be done within the world and it is out there waiting. The concept of working together and looking out for each other needs to come back into play because people are for themselves only. There needs to be more HEALTHY marriages that take place within the black community, more parents that take control of how their kids operate within the school system, and take back full control of our broken communities to start building them back up to what they can and will be.
Do we even have the power to fight anymore? Or is the power within others hands? These are questions that ask myself on a daily basis. Our human nature is to look out for ourselves, but God teaches us that we are to give without expecting anything in return. This concept can be so hard to go by because you and I may have had so many things taken away from us that we are trying to hold on to the little bit that we have left. In order to get recognized in a positive light there needs to be more giving that takes place. More giving that comes from our hearts, and removing the selfishness. Hopefully this a dream that I can start turning more into a reality, but I can't do it without your help.

But if God got us, we gon' be ALRIGHT!! *Kendrick Lamar voice*

Don't settle

I have recently started to really embrace who I am and what I stand for. Now for many people they might have thought that I was already there, but I definitely was not. In the past I was always scared to really be myself because of what people may have thought about me. I was afraid to put myself out there because I was too busy comparing myself to other people and what they were doing. Let me give you a piece of advice, do not and I repeat DO NOT compare yourself to others in no way possible. It does not matter if someone is already doing what your doing or what your trying to do, please save yourself from drowning in the sea of comparing.

For instance I was looking into a particular field to maybe go back to school for because I thought that it was something meant for me. I mean I really tried to convince myself that I can do this particular job just because I had seen a couple other people doing it and loving it. Then one night I had a dream that I was driving and I went from being on a paved road to a dirt road where my car started to lose control. I ended up turning my car around and getting back on the paved road that I was originally on. That dream to me was a sign and warning to myself to not go in that direction. I had received revaluation from God that I was trying to put myself in a box and do something just because someone thought it would be a good fit for me. The key word is someone! Just because someone tell you to do something does not mean that God created you to do so. 

The moral of this story is that when someone suggest you to do something think about it first instead of diving head first into it. Ask God if you were created to do this. When you ask you 100% get the answer back even if it is not right away. There is much more to this life than trying to place yourself in something that you will be limited in. When you follow God there is no limit to what he has for you. As I am growing, I am starting to realize that the opportunities are endless. I have trained myself to think that I have to limit myself to what may be easy for me. Through challenges there will be accomplishments that you may not even recognize. The accomplishments comes when you start to believe in who you are and not settle for what people want you to do, but what God wants you to do. Don't ever t settle, there is much more out there to achieve!  

Be Honest

Last week I had the opportunity to see Queen Latifah interviewed at a local University where I stay. She was down to earth and humble, she also had some very good life tips she shared with the audience. The three tips were perseverance, be honest with yourself, and find the people that are most honest with you and stick with them. Out of those three tips the first one that stuck out to me was to be honest with yourself. Sometimes you have to have that pep talk with yourself on various decisions you make within your life. There will be times when many things will also influence your decisions like television, social media, or what your friend might be doing. You have to remember that you are your own person and you were fearfully and wonderfully made by God to be something that nobody else can be. Isn't that just lovely to think about and to let soak in. To really embrace that you are your own person is a process and it is a journey, but that is the beauty of it all. While in the mirror you can speak affirmations over yourself that can make your self-esteem go up. Being honest with yourself does not always have to be painful, but it can be an epiphany moment to where you start believing in yourself much more than you did before.

The second one was to have honest people in your corner. When I want to ask an opinion on something that I may be going through or maybe a choice I am considering making I call the people that are going to shoot it to me straight and not play games. Everyone should have at least one person in their corner that will be able to let you know about yourself in a way that will not always hurt your feelings, but you know it is coming from a genuine place. If there is nobody that you can think of that could be honest with you then there may be some rearranging you need to do. I believe it is also the key to Queen Latifah's successful path. She stated she always had people that would be honest with her within her circle and it helped a lot with the strategic decisions she made to become who she is today.

There is also an ugly side to being honest with someone. Sometimes people don't want to hear what you have to say even if they asked you your opinion. It can turn people from wanting to hear what you have to say, to them downing the honesty that's coming from you and you alone. Don't allow this to keep your mouth shut. There has to be a thick skin formed within the world today because there are many platforms that allow people to comment on what you do and sometimes not be so nice about it. Just because someone may not like what you do or say, does not mean that they are not paying attention to what you do or say. Be honest with yourself even when nobody else is.

Learning to live Intentionally.

What's up everyone?!?! So the first day of Spring was yesterday (March 20th) and I am already feeling the winter blues going far far away. Winters are always sooooo long, dreary, and gloomy. Now that Spring has arrived it is time to do the usual Spring cleaning and get rid of the old to replace with new! What are your goals for Spring? Is there anything you may want to accomplish by Summer? Since the beginning of January at the church I attend, there has been teachings on living your life intentionally.  I thought about this type of living a little further and I started to reflect on whether I have been living life intentionally. The answer to that was a big fat no! I realized that I have been just pretty much going through life planning some things here and there, but not really trying as hard as I can to live intentionally. There are plenty of things I would like to do such as traveling, arts and crafts, etc., but have I really been trying to coordinate these various things in my life INTENTIONALLY? The word intentional means done on purpose. When we are living on purpose instead of for just winging it through life, I feel that a lot of the things we've hoped and prayed for will fall into place. We are all on this earth for a purpose so why not live life on purpose? We are almost done with the first quarter of 2016. Time seems to be going by faster and faster, but if you are living life intentionally maybe, juuuust maybe time will start to be on your side.

Faith Driven.

The faith concept has been something that I have struggled with a long time until recently. Yesterday I had a powerful conversation about how we as people are not the authors of our life, but it is really in God's hand to write our story. We live in a world where everyone has statuses and quotes on social media making you believe that you are the only person that creates your own life. When we take matters in our own hands it makes it way more difficult to live an abundant life because you are trying to do everything yourself and keep up with everyone. We are so busy trying to find our gifts alone, find creativity within us alone, or figure out life in general alone. Once you start trying to do everything on your own you end up burning yourself out and being depressed and oppressed. You see us humans are not strong enough to live our lives on our own, especially with all of the trials and tribulations that we may go through. There is only one person that can help you with EVERYTHING YOU NEED and that is GOD!

I have been around people that have been practicing faith for years and never really understood how powerful faith is, but the closest example to my life is my Mother. My mother is the only person that I know that really loves her career and what she does which is being an elementary school Teacher. She gets up happy everyday to go to work no joke. I always wondered how did she end up finding something just right for her that she genuinely loves. My mother did not grow up saying she wanted to be a teacher nor did she grow up in an environment where she was encouraged to be in that field. God, destiny, and faith literally placed my mother in her career. She was a mom before she went to college and my grandmother helped raise my brother. After graduating college she got a teaching job immediately in an area she was not familiar with. She didn't let that stop her as she drove almost 4 hours from where she grew up to start her new journey.While on her journey she ended up meeting my father and getting married, adding two new additions to her family (My sister and I).  The best part about this story is that she grew saying she just wanted to work in a factory and live a simple life. She didn't see herself teaching and and that is the beauty of faith. It is not supposed to be seen and it is not what is within your physical sight. Your circumstances does not control your destiny.

Our plans are not God plans and we do not have control of our life. Everyday consists of new beginnings and it consists of different things and situations. If you have a plan that you have been trying to go by that you created yourself and it is not working out, take that plan and throw it out the window. Consult with God about what HE would like for you to do and the answers will come. Also you have to learn to be patient in order to hear from God because it is not always right when you ask him that you will receive the answer. I cannot tell you how many times I have prayed and wanted an answer so bad, but didn't get the answer until well after.  In meantime you have to teach yourself to continue to practice having faith and drill it within yourself. Faith consists of works and it will be dead if there is no work done.

Your body is a temple, treat it as such.

Have you ever felt like you were disgusted with a habit you may not be able to quit easily? Or maybe you feel like you want to change something about yourself that can easily be done, but you have been procrastinating heavily (as I raise my hand). Well....I am going to be brutally honest and open about mines. Right now in my life I am not at a weight that I am used to and yes I know some may have noticed, but a lot of people have not. I tend to be able to hide how I feel about certain things and what I weigh well. You may be thinking to yourself, she takes a lot of pictures and she seems to be so confident? Let me tell you I am my hardest critic for myself. Ever since I had my son it has been hard to break the habit of eating what I want and proportioning my meals. Since I am short I really need to be careful of how much weight I actually put on because it can become dangerous and come with many health risks. It also does not help that I have a job where I sit all day in front of computers and sometimes I forget about getting up out of my chair. I'm very thankful for being able to sit, but it can be a gift and a curse at the same time. Before I had my son weight was not an issue for me, I could eat Chipotle all day and not gain anything. When you have a child or children your body changes and very rarely goes back to being the same. It is harder sometimes to lose weight and it may have slowed your metabolism down. There are some mothers that "snap back" per say, but they can probably tell you that they feel different as well if you ask them.

I don't want some quick so called health plan that ends up making you gain more weight back when you stop. I really want to change my whole eating habits for the better completely. Meaning more vegetables, fruits, and healthy proteins. The reason for my weight loss not being as successful as I would like are because I am procrastinating and I LOOOOVE Food! Especially food that are considered carbs and starches which I am definitely not supposed to be eating to lose weight and it does not help speed up the process. When someone has a goal they are determined and procrastination is no where within their motivation. I've decided to take control of what is going on and make my body feel better and make myself feel better as a whole. The bible teaches us that our body is a temple (1 Corinthians 6:19) in which I have not been following. I have been reflecting over my life for the past couple of months and evaluating myself from the inside, out. I feel like I should take better care of my body for myself and my family. This journey also does not only consists of working on my body, but on the inside of my body also. Coming from a family background of heart disease, diabetes, and strokes I need to be more conscious about the decisions I make towards my future. I will be on a new journey to find healthier alternatives to eat and also learn how to portion my meals again. Eating food is important for the nourishment of my body, but it should not be an obsession or constantly on my mind. I honestly want to get to the point of food being less complicated than I have made it. God did not create us so beautifully for us to harm what he fearfully and wonderfully made. It is time to do better!

Thanks for the support in advance and I will be keeping you all updated! My only hope out of this is that I am able to be transparent with my struggles I am having and it could maybe help or inspire someone else.

Until next time :)

Secrets to Life.

Deuteronomy 29:29 NIV

The secret things belong to the Lord our God, but the things revealed belong to us and to our children forever, that we may follow all the words of this law.

Yesterday on my lunch break I heard a coworker of mines talk about taking a personality test and his results. I found this very interesting and I decided to take the test for myself. My personality results were ENFP. Some of the celebrities with this trait were Oprah Winfrey and Will Smith.

ENFPs are warm, enthusiastic people, typically very bright and full of potential. They live in the world of possibilities, and can become very passionate and excited about things. Their enthusiasm lends them the ability to inspire and motivate others, more so than we see in other types.

Lately I have been doing a a lot of soul searching on possibly how I can change the world with a career that would let me do so. Now when I seen the results for career choices I really asked myself a question. Why am I working hard to be normal?

In life we as people work so hard to be normal that we don't even realize we are doing this to ourselves. Think about it, we get stuck into a routine of going to work and then coming home and going to bed. Have we changed anything within the world by having the same routine? Of course it is not wise to abruptly quit your job and try to figure out things without a plan. By asking myself that question it unlocked a lot of answers I've been waiting for.

On my drive home I was thinking about that test and it led to me having a personal conversation with God asking him what is next in my life? I'm tired of the same routine...what is next? Finally I heard the words loud and clear. "Your life is not yours, it is mines". When I heard those words it finally clicked that I am in the position of doing what I don't want to do because I have tried to control my life by myself instead of letting God take the lead. If I remove myself and let him take the steps ahead of me I will make my life 100 percent easier.

I thank god for this confirmation that took place on yesterday. I am excited about the journey that I have ahead in my life. You should be excited as well because God does not want our lives to be a routine. He wants us to do things that people notice and things that will change people's perspective of life.

The secret things belong to God and if he was to give us everything that would happen in our lives then it would defeat our purpose. We all have to have a journey for a reason. The more we let our journey happen the wiser we become in the Lord.

If you would like to take the personality test I took the website link is below:

http://www.humanmetrics.com/cgi-win/jtypes2.asp

Sound Mind/Peace

Philippians 4:8 Begin to think on the Word or begin to sing a praise song to God. Make a conscious effort to fill your mind with good, pure, wholesome, and lovely thoughts.

When I get angry or feel like there is too much noise in my life, prayer or singing to God are not the first things that come to mind. At first I want to stay mad or have a whining session and stay to myself for the majority of the day. Everyday there are situations that I don't like and throw my positivity off.

I have been working hard to become better with trying to release the anger at that moment and not let it carry over. The scripture says to fill our minds with good, pure, wholesome, and lovely thoughts. The more I practice this principle, the better I am able to express how I feel and not keep it within me, even though I still have my moments. There is also a bigger battle that is being fought with my flesh and spirit because of the effort I am putting in to make myself a better person.

When I keep negativity and anger within me about certain situations it starts to feel like poison is taking control. It feels as if there is a thorn going right through my heart. The light that I have starts to dim and everything I practice in order to be positive has been thrown out the window.

God wants us to enjoy life no matter what circumstances come our way. It feels a whole lot better to wake up everyday knowing that I have not carried over any negativity that has happened yesterday to the current day. I have learned to be more thankful to rise out of my bed and go to work or anywhere else I choose no matter what I am facing. All of the bad things I could think about are the last things that begin to take control of my mind. The devil tries to control your mind, but you have the power to take your mind back with Gods help.

People don't realize that starting their day off with a simple thank you to God with a scripture or two actually works. It prepares your day to be positive and free. It also prepares them to be open to blessings whether they are big or small. No blessing should be overlooked and the word prepares you to take on the daily challenges life brings.

Remember to always make a conscious effort to fill your mind with good, pure, wholesome, and lovely thoughts.